Thrifty Nuts

Hello all...

Wanna know how to make this?

Wanna know how to bake this?
(rainbow cake bake by yours truly!)

Wanna know where to get dim sum like these? Yumyums



















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What are you waiting for?!?

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Thank you very much!

Graduation 2012

Needless to say...

CONGRATULATIONS to all my seniors that has graduated! <3

(okay, too many to be named. the more important ones, I have already texted.. and attended their graduation! haha)

Good luck to your next big step in life alrights! be it, University, work or NS.

I am so happy for all of you! you have survived! 

At times like this, I can't wait to graduate too!

but at the same time again, I can't bear to graduate. It is like a Yes/No. Love/Hate..

Oh well, life has to go on right? I have to move on... & I want to advance further. 

endure, endure.. only less than a year to go.

I will write my long blogspot about my graduation then... (provided that I am still blogging).
so many thoughts running through my mind.. it seems like I have so many things to write about my 3 years poly life..
Yeah, I have to agree that.. painful and happy memories leaves the deepest impression. 

Okay, talking about graduation.

I shall host a party! & invite all my friends who are graduating! woohoo~! excited...

I wanna receive cards! balloons! flowers! & bears! WAKU WAKU!

scaly, I didn't receive a single thing. I will be so sad... :(... so, I have already bribe my mom. to get my flowers and bear already! hahaha. #fail!

& graduation trip!! :) 

1)with yuxin, mulan, shijie? huiqi? 

2) with classmates?

3)with Nat!

4) somewhere with people I adore!

& my deal with my friend to take pictures around the campus!
maybe.. go to studio and take pictures as well?

Oh! I got the urge to do a campus tour video in my robe! woohoo~! GOOD IDEA?^^
Yuxin & Mulan, shall be the co-planner. Okays?

*Please dont steal my idea kayes! I will be so sad.. hahaha.

Alrights, I shall enjoy my last poly year to the fullest then! gonna miss all my lecturers!  the food in SP. & not forgetting, the beautiful memories I had in SP. they shall stay with me forever~

once again.. CONGRATS! ^^

byebye!

My future?

Maybe an all round artiste?

I want to be one that can act, sing, & maybe dance.
I want to have my own album.
I want to act in drama serial.
& I want to appear in a movie.
The one that has more fans than anti fans.

I want to be famous, I want fame & recognition. ^^ hehe.

& at the same time, I will venture my business of my events company :)
Woohoo! All inter-linked! Yaaattttaa~! :D
Events company specialised in which sector? that will depends again.

& adding to my event company (which most probably includes bridal)
I will set up my fashion store, shoes store, make up store, hair store, nail store, beauty & rejuvenating store!

Yes, the company is what I actually want in life. ( No infringement please.. I will kill you)
But the acting & singing is really my passion from young. REALLY.

& if possible. I would like to open a bistro too! :)

& I will do lotsa invesments. Hahaha!

& I would love to travel around frequently! ( have branches overseas)

OMG OMG, Feels like writing a proposal now.
My concept & etc is there, but how shall I implement it? :(
How much budget do I need?
What resources do I need?
How how how? LOL.

Too ambitious?

We shall see...

It is not like anything is fixed.. I am a indecisive woman. :(

I hate myself.

I have an aimless life, I see no future in myself, I am just so useless.

putting myself in thoughts, I wonder what I have done in my past 19 years of life. (practically nothing)
What have I achieved? (nothing)
What can I be in future? or rather How will my future be like. (nothing)

Everyone looked down on me, despise me, and hated me.

How can I survive? everything is so tough now.

I hate growing up, I hate facing reality.

I hate myself.

All I know is spending money, wasting my time, wasting resources, being good-for-nothing, being a trouble-maker, having many sickness/illnesses, being someone detestable, having overflowing negative feelings & thoughts, making people who cares sad.
What else am I capable of?

I had the thought of ending my life. It makes me feels that, the world might be better without me.

I just feel like crying.. so badly.

I felt that I have let my mother( mama, & ppl I love) down, she slog her life to bring me up, they showered me with love, pampered me with care and they are always supportive of my decisions...and yet I am so useless.

I am just a waste of time, money & resources.

What can I do... what shall I do...

Portfolio

Abish, I was looking through my old goodies stuffs, and found a list of things I wanna do when I was 14/15.

& the first one on the list is to, slim down & have my portfolio taken after I remove my braces. :(

But, up till now... I have not taken my portfolio pictures yet.

I think it is because I gained weight instead of losing! sighhh.

I really want to have my portfolio shots taken. (at least before 21st okayes!)

Theme: Wearing traditional costumes from Japan, Korea, Thai, & all the countries you can think of!

& of course, going to different location to have my shots taken.  (eg, at the playground, at the beach, at tourist attractions)

& obviously, must have different outfits! make up & HAIRSTYLES.~! ^^

I just want to try all sorts of different styles!

Okay okay! I found my motivation to slim down!

May my wish come true okay?! :)

REALLY WANT TO TAKE MY PORTFOLIO SHOTS BEFORE I GROW OLD & DIE. :(

& PS: I don't want to take when I am already like 20 +, cause by then, I dun think I have time for such fun already.. sigh!

& see, now babies also got their portfolio shots. (at least for Raeann & Raechelle!) When I was young, I had nothing! :( haha. different era, i know right! but my sis got her portfolio taken when she was 17/18?! lol, She has more time than me at that age I suppose! & life back then was more relax, what I feel lah!

& I dont think I am getting married, so.. I wont have wedding photos taken. sad not?

GUESS WHAT? to my horror/dissapointment/sadness... I lost all of my pictures of my performances in different outfits during primary school. I SO WANNA CRY.

So, this time round, god bless me to slim down, have my flawless perfect baby skin back, long luscious hair for styling kayes! I am even thinking about my fringe now! bangs or slant or keep it long. (I think I should keep it long right? since there are like wigs, and clip on fringe now... )


Okay okay! I am so excited now! I want to take pictures in different traditional outfits & act like part of their nation! Muahaha, I don't care if anyone gonna laugh at me for being outdated.

Hopefully, there are still studios that sells this service.. if not.. don't tell me I have to buy the costumes myself?! (or, I should visit that country instead? )


PS: I LOVE TAKING PICTURES LAH. CANNOT MEH?
not that I am very zi-lian or what....& it is not as if like I am god damn pretty or have model-like figure...it is because I want to keep memories before it fades, and to capture that moment before anyone/anything changes. You never know what will happen in future right?

at least, I will have something to safe guard for life.

God bless that I will still survive by then.

I WANT MY PICTURES TAKEN!!! (~_~)


------------------editted at 22.53 pm-----------------------------------

Mentioning about photos.

1) I really want polaroid pogo! Seriously. but I am so tight on budget. would love anyone who buy that for me. REALLY! Pretty please? :(

2) I need a external hard disc. This is to save all my pictures and documents in it. (pictures from mini laptop, big laptop, desktop, disc I burned photo into, handphones & memory cards). This is so important! was browsing through my old pictures & realised how pictures can bring back memories! Most importantly, I need to collate all my pictures together & print out the pretty ones!

3) I need polaroid films! cause I will be getting my hello kitty 7s instax soon!

4) I want to take neoprints!

Okay, shall end this post with a pretty picture of mine! hahaha.


See, told ya I am a trendsetter right? I trended ROMPERS when I was less than 3! hahaah

byebye!

Overwhelming projects

My life is all about research now... On printing companies. :X

Research is one thing, compiling the research is the really tough thing.

I hope I can handle it well this time round... and leave a good impression to my team members. :)

Several thoughts are running through my mind lately, and I don't know what I am thinking now.
I guess it is time for me to reflect on why others dislike me. and make a change myself instead of trying to change their mindsets.

Although I try to tell myself to ignore them, but I know I can't. I have to figure out what is wrong. & sometimes I just think too much & cause myself feeling miserable or having insomnia.

What have I done. this kind of feeling is so... too much for me to take. Since most of the people feels that way, there must be something wrong with me. like seriously.

maybe it is just fate and luck? I really don't know.

以前$10可以吃5天，现在$10可以吃1餐。。。

Sigh, I want to go back to the past whereby $10 meant something to me.
life was so much simpler back then.

Who cares about the advance technology?
Who cares about the advancement?

No doubt we are literally enjoying life right now, but touch your hearts, who is really happy?
(I am talking about fellows in Singapore)
Especially when I have stepped into the working age. I realised... Singaporeans are really pathetic now.
We live for the sake of Money, to provide us with food, house, transport and leisure.
So everyday, we just wake up & think about our well-being, and think about how we need money to survive. & we rush to work.

It is by then, we forget to take time out for our aging parents, and take time to interact and care for people around us. We even neglect the beautiful nature and scenery god has given to us.

No doubt we have "better" life now, thanks to the government that has implemented many schemes and laws. and building of great infrastructures. but... is that what we really want at the end of the day?

What is my purpose of life? what is your purpose of life.

Of course, I am not saying that we should not work and wait for things to drop from the sky. We should still work hard to achieve our life-long goals and do something meaningful in our lives. but I am just very sad that how money has changed us. and Money, Money... Money is the root of evil.

How many people out there betrays their conscience for money? How many people violate the laws for money?

Even I myself thinks that money is very very important. :X (self-slap)

What has the world became?

I am really sad, but yet... I still love money. I hate myself for feeling that way.. but money is still so important that I have to overcome my sadness & move on.

I understand in life, money is not everything... but if you dont have money.. you really have to figure out something.

WHY WHY WHY. :(

I hate the person that invented money. (but I have to thank him too, he/she made humans improve).

How I wish money is not that important to us,like in the past...
decades ago, people love money.. but they don't betray their close ones for money.
I prefer the kampong type of life. whereby everyone helps everyone.
& everyone have fun & party together.
Life was simpler= better then....

Although I have not live in a Kampong.. but how I miss those times as a child.
Whereby money isn't everything...What is need is just food, fun & love.

I just dont want to grow up :(

Just some pictures to share...

I don't feel good.

I understand that someone out there is always better than me in all aspect.
but, I just can't help to feel inferior when almost everyone is better than you. :X

I wish,

I wish I was born petite and pretty.
I wish I am smart. (oh well, I used to be.. but now.. sigh)
I wish I had good grades that will make me go under the honors roll!
I wish I am a master of something.
I wish I am born with a talent.
I wish that I have more determination.
I wish I have loving brothers, that will dote on me.
I wish everyone likes me.
I wish I had good friends that will stay with me forever.
I wish I have a perfect family. (I used to have, my father used to dote on me, alot alot... USED TO)
I wish that my grandparents were still alive.
I wish that people around me wont leave me. ( literally, or physically)
I wish that I am super rich. (so when ppl say I am rich, I will reply. Yeah.. and stuff money into their mouth)


Now, I do know who I am.
I have nothing to be proud of myself.
I have no skills, no talents, no looks.

I used to be one of the students with better grades in my sec sch, but now.. i am the worse... probably in my whole cohort. Even my classmates console each other with my grades. Eg, Dont worry, you are better than aipoh. Just dont be as worse as her. All these comments actually hurts, they think that I didn't knew about it. or even if I know about it, I just kept mum or laugh it off. Keep life positive.
I feel even more like killing myself after looking at how well my secondary sch friends have done in their poly life. I am really happy for them, but sad for myself. I mean, I used to be better than them. :X

There is nothing to expect from myself anymore.
I don't know where to head to after poly. (with such results)
I am really sad that I can't get into a local uni anymore. but what to do? I created this mess myself.
I hate it when I have to waste more money going into private uni. (which might not want me too)
My life is a total upside down now. :X
I may look happy but I feels like shit inside.
Sometimes, I just want to end my life.

I know that I am fat and average looking (not ugly, but not pretty). and everyone around me looks so pretty, with model-like figure. :( and they have beautiful legs, unlike me which had my leg operated and leave a beautiful scar on myself. I love my legs the most, now, it is just another piece of junk attach to my body. I don't even pamper it with foot reflexology  ( & I can't, due to the screws in it ). and my nails have became so friggin ugly. I wanted to slim down, but I realise... it is just so hard.

Yeah, people are laughing at my fats, & I am laughing together with them. cause I feel that I look like clown too.

& I have a bad health. I can't be as healthy and sporty as my friends out there. I didn't choose to be like this.

I am a loser, a quitter. I never accomplished anything in my life.
be it, a language, an instrument or a skill.
What good have I done? huh? 

I am a coward. I turned down many opportunities in being a leader. No matter how strongly people encourage me, and tell me how much potential I have. I don't know why, I just dislike the feeling of bearing the responsibilities. Maybe I have high expectations of myself in that particular role and am afraid that I may not do a good job, or my friends might hate me, just because I am of a "higher rank".  (trust me, there are people like that) I just dont want any disputes in my life. I want everyone to be happy.

I don't know, I just feel that..

since I am stepping into adulthood soon.
It is really time for me to think.

What I want in life. realistically.
I seriously dont wish to continue my life like this.
& I can't possibly go back to the past. I want to cry, so badly.

:(

I want this badly...

Pretty please, I really want this. >:>
My polaroid is spoilt. :X ( shall not elaborate on this)

I am always looking for a portable polaroid printer,
something like what my brother has, which prints out polariod.
& I have heard of pogo last time! (please go google it yourself, too lazy to intro this product)
However, I chose to own a polaroid 2/3 years ago.

Now, since it is spoilt (not really completely gone, but yeah :X)
I really like this!
& it is in pink!

Should I get it?!

Any sponsors not? hahaha.
Hint: My sis owes me a birthday present.
But.. I understand her situation, financing 2 kids is really not easy. sigh..
Anyone else wanna get it for me?
God of fortune, maybe you? :D

PS: oh well, I was hesitating if I should post this, cause I have stalkers on my blog, which also loves copying me. :S looking at the positive side, this is something good yeah?
It means that I am a trend setter! hahaha.

Okay,
am still trying to get use to this new blogger format. !

Goodbye, goodnight!

Some things are better left unsaid

Yeah, some things are indeed better left unsaid.

If you can't speak anything nice, speak nothing. maybe maybe.

I guess I am really stepping closer and closer to the society.

I don't understand why, what makes the society like this? who started all this vicious cycle? why can't everyone be peaceful and just get their stuffs done? :X

I really don't know, I am trying to stop myself from becoming like them.
but if this continues, and I, as a human... might learn to be like them too. (which is something I don't want)

I guess, this time round, I am really numb towards everything.
I have nothing much more to expect from my poly life, but just to follow instructions, and get my diploma.
I don't even want to voice out any opinions which are unworthy to others, I don't even want to explain for myself anymore.
I just don't want people to think that I do not care about my own future, cause I do.
as for grades, I just don't want to stress myself, cause even if I stress myself and ace all the way, I can't even enter to a local uni.

Poly life is just so unpleasant for me, it is driving me nuts (but I am still standing strong!).
the people, the environment, the bad experiences, the cruel reality I had to face.
No doubt I still met good people & lecturers (& I appreciate/thank god they appeared), no doubt I still had fun & joy, no doubt some life-long experiences are something I am really appreciative for. No doubt, I had great memories.
I guess, it is just something for me to learn, a step I am taking in my life.
yeah, I learnt & I am still learning. :X
& it is not that I do not care about my grades. It is just that I don't want to stress myself further just because of my lousy grades.
I regretted, and I cry a million time in year 1, but that is all in the past.
tears and regrets wont change the facts, the truth and you can't escape from anything.
I learn to see things in a wider horizon.
I want a happy and awesome poly life & memories to reminisce on in future. (not only painful & bad memories!)
I just want to continue to be the happy-go-lucky Aipoh, whom do what she wants/loves.
(the one who will lend her helping hand without any hesitation. :X)
So, I AM MOVING ON.

Although it is so hard to pretend that you are fine when you are not. but, I have learnt to really be cool & calm to all situations. Maybe, maybe I will still feel a tinge of sadness, guilt, disappointment. but I wont allow all these mixed feelings to last long inside me.
I am not trying to be a hypocrite. I am just convincing myself to be neutral to what/who I dislike so as to not cause further problems. & hating people is just so tiring.(for me). I just don't want these negative emotions to bring me down. I am trying to stay positive. Trying very hard to.

I bet you will never guess how I felt.
When people are always doing "small actions" behind your backs. (to stir up problems, conflicts & misunderstandings)
When people told other they can't get along with you, and told you they can't get along with others. (hmmm, wth?)
When people just pretended to be so caring and nice in front of everyone. ( like really?? )
When people are saying something bad about you, and you heard them, and they didn't know you heard them, and they can act so okay to you.
So many zillion times that I can't count. ( & most of the time, they are talking about the same things, My grades, my parents, my attitude, my project work - wont sian one meh? at least, change a topic?)
but  I know, I do know everything. I just didn't want to voice out, and turn everything ugly.
& the other side of me wants you guys to really know me well & who I am.

It is just so hurtful and sad at times, especially when you thought that they were your friends. >.<.
I am sorry, I don't meant to be mean by blogging this out and have no intention to quarrel with anyone because of all these "nonsense".

No denial, I had abit of hatred too. for all parties, I hate that I am not perfect that is why people are talking about me. I hate myself that I am unable to clarify and fight for myself.
I hate myself for portraying the wrong kind of image from the start that causes people to think that way of me.
I guess I left a really bad impression, and I am ashamed of myself.
I feel so inferior among my friends and unlike and unappreciated.
This is one of the reason why i dreaded coming to school so much, so so much.
I hate going to somewhere that doesn't welcomes you.
I simply don't enjoy my poly life. there are so many dramas in it. :X
I believe I had blog about this before, and I really hope things will turn well and get better... REALLY.

I don't know, I am just too tired . I don't want the vicious cycle to continue. ( cause I don't want to be like them :X )So let's it all end with me. Say for all you want. I believe in justice, and one day, I will definitely prove everyone that looked down on me wrong.  I swear. I want to change my mindset, easy to say, hard to do, but I will try.
Life has to go on, I know a better future is awaiting for me.

At the end of the day, I am the one that will be walking my own path. Assume what you what to assume, Judge what you want to judge, say what you want to say. I am not stopping any of you, & I have no rights to stop any of you. I know myself the best, as long as I believe what I am doing is morally right, and that I learnt from my mistakes. I am gonna be me. ( Although I agree that my attitude towards poly life is not commendable, but I will change, change for the better)

I have to thank god, that gave me the strength to face all this. I believe, god is with me & everyone.
Idiom of the day: 人在做，天在看。。。Good luck to all, good or bad, karma will get you. :)

Disclaimer: I am not pin-pointing anyone here, I am just referring to my own thoughts IN my own blog.

Life will be better.

SCHOOL'S REOPENING

SIGH. This is a very sad thing to me! HAHAHA.

I can't believe that my holidays are ending soon :X

Gonna work doubly hard for the last lap in my poly life. take part in every activity I can! pursue all my dreams, put in a little more efforts in my studies (please, for god's sake), pay more attention to the places, people and things in SP. Seize everything chances and opportunities, gain some achievements, leave a good reputation and impressions. Be genki & happy everyday!

& may I graduate with wonderful, sweet, beautiful & unforgettable memories! ^^

Although I think I will miss SP (all the people, food, places there), the place where I spent my youth in the place where I learn the most & grew up in! the place with the most painful lessons learnt... :(

But! I can't wait to graduateeeee! & move on to the next big step in my life! (which is hopefully better!) :D

Wanted to post the above as my FB status.. but, I am too lazy to think of content to blog. :X

byebye!

Sent with love

This is my first time sewing a pouch like this!
It is not very nice, but... I made everything myself!
Feels so proud when I finally completed it after hours!

All sent out! :)
I wonder why is the shipping fee so expensive!:(
wanted to airmail, but had to choose surface mail instead!

Sigh, I am so so so unlucky today! :(
guess I need to make a trip to the temple soon!

Holiday is ending soon.
Thank god my new timetable is not that bad!

Anyway, I just read my sis blog.
She say that her fat sis (which is me, in this case) is very bias towards Raeann.
Yeah, No doubt... I love & dote on Raechelle more. No denial.
I love young kids and babies. I REALLY DO.
But I will never forget what an horror Raeann is.
I have to admit that she is very sweet & lovely sometimes & she is smart.
But she is too smart to the extend that she can always tell lies, even when she is only 5 this year. she started telling lie from 1 year plus.

I know I am petty, but I will never forget how badly my father scolded me because of her. (that was 3 years ago, when she was less than 2)
She pull my hair and hit me first, and then she complains to my dad that "yiyi da wo" ( I hit her)
When I NEVER laid any fingers on her.
That was when I felt how scary this young kid can be.
& there are many more stories you can never imagine.
She can be sucha 2-headed snake, and causes people to quarrel.
I just feel that she is an horror.
She can even talk-back to you.

& when she loses in an argument. She cries. & she wins.
She screams & whine & cry when she couldn't get what she wants. (I have to admit that, she is much better than the past now)
She even "took" things without others permission.

She loves bullying my dear Ethan.
to the extend, she pushes him and causes him to injure himself.
There was once, she threw Ethan's bolster (the one that has been sticking with him for years) down from the window.
Please tell me, if this kind of action is right.

She is not only cranky and bad when Meimei's just borne.
She is like that from the time where she learns to crawl, walk & talk.

Recently, she tried to open my luggage.

& when I tried to stop her.
She kick them.
*heartache*

I brought them back from Japan with much difficulties. & there she is, kicking them?!

Despite all this, I tried my best to treat her well.
But she is so mischievous and unreasonable most of the time.
Maybe our character just doesn't match.

I do love her, I do dote on her. but I feel that there must be someone to be fierce to her.
if not, I can't imagine how bad she will become with her doting dad, grandmother & etc.

& I obviously love meimei more, because I have yet to find any reasons to not to do so.
I am sorry for being so bias, but I was nice to everyone in the first place.
My sis should be glad that I really dote on MeiMei.

& since we are in this topic.
I believe no one is ever Fair.

an eg is how my mom dote on my sis more.
(Everyone can see that too)
I bet this is just life and fate.

I am sorry I have to blog this way.
Cause I felt that I have the rights to clarify myself.

I don't want others to think that I am bias for NO REASONS.

cause obviously, there are so many reasons WHY.

I don't care if you guys think that I am mean or petty.
Wait till you are in my shoes, then you will know. 

Feels so flattered

My life has been overwhelming.
It is so cool to know that people are actually fond of who you are. (maybe not everyone, but heck)
I am pretty amaze by myself. So much for self-praising.

I enjoy being myself. the happy-go-lucky aipoh, whereby everyone is happy when I am around and that when everyone is happy, I am happy.

It is like, back to the past where hatred only last for a minute( or a day). and tears flows naturally.

I want to go back to Japan.
I feel so loved and welcomed by everyone, I don't know if it is me or their culture over there.
I just felt so loved.

but, good times doesn't last. :( sigh. I am back in Singapore now.
I seriously hate saying goodbye to people when I know I wont be meeting them again anytime soon. SIGH, SIGH SIGH.
I seriously love them so much, but I love my mother, hemama & my family even more.
Tough decisions, tough decisions.

I guess this is also the reason why I didn't want to get into a r/s. cause I am too vulnerable to accept a r/s that might not go well. I am sorry.

So much for ta-ta ing.

I want to go back to Japan, fukuoka, to meet all my lovely friends, all my lovers, and I want to roll on the grass again!

I want to do crazy stunts, and forget all my soes and worries!

I want to be freeeeeeeeeee~~~~!

Oh well, my image is totally ruined and gone in Japan. :(
so much for being the loving, kind and demure aipoh. (NO MORE T_T)
I am now a crazy and genki bitch that screams, laugh and shout on the streets in Japan, rolling on the grass.
LE SIGH.
I want to be an  おじょうさま !
I miss being a rich and happy lady! (with many self-proclaim lovers. hahaha)

back to Singapore, back to reality,
life in singapore now is eating, sleeping, computering, eating, sleeping. the cycle continues.

how I envy them, their high school life is really like what is shown in the drama.
I am jealous. I also want to walk under the cherry blossoms with my high school lover and perhaps, have my first kiss in the snow or under the cherry blossom.
I really want that kind of life. (if only nihao uncle is still around, Japan might probably be my third home now!)
I also want to dress up differently with 4 different seasons.
I also want to be a president of student council! (not really for this, just envy)
I want to contribute to the society!


Okay, I shall save my first kiss. to make my wish come true! hope I wont be too old for all these child-play. I am turning 20 soon! :(. but hey! I am young at heart! haha.

I die die also must go overseas to study after my poly. 1 more year. ENDURE & ENJOY.
Japan, korea, taiwan or australia it shall be!

Byebye!

Turning 20...

Sigh, this is depressing.
I am turning 20 & yet, I have accomplished nothing in my life. :(
the thought of it just make me so sad.
why am I so useless.

All I know is being crazy, having fun & laughing all day long. >.< so uncool!
I need to get things done. SIGH.

I doubt I will ever have the chance to become an international superstar anymore. Oh well. Maybe I should proceed on to the next plan, becoming successful in life.

Anyway, I am back from Japan!
the trip was simply awesome!
Will blog about it soon!

ta-da for now!

Life is good good!

Being with the japanese students makes me happy!
I can be myself! (crazy & dangerous! sigh)
I would love to brush up my Japanese tough!

Anyway, I have been thinking about my future! I want to have many many kids, or none! but most probably, I wont get married. Haha, unless I go Japan & find a guy, and just stay there forever!

I think I will be a good wife! really! I can cook pretty well! & I can take care of babies & do housework.
In other words, I am just like an obasan (aunty). Sigh.

Alrights, gonna sleep!

Bye!

You don't say....

Havent been blogging lately!

Life has been pretty much cool & fun! I am really busy! yeah, ironically, I am busier during holidays! Everyday is about shopping/playing & having fun! spending money. *le sigh*

PS: My SD card slot is spoilt. Can't upload pictures to my laptop. Oh well...Must get a card reader!

Anyway, let me share bout my recently happenings! (I reckon this blogpost to be rather messy cause I will just blog what I can think of!)

First thing first! I would like to welcome all ANCT students from Japan! welcome to Singapore! I really had fun with them (& of course, the SP helpers) for the past few days, & tired as well. & USS trip was torturous, I felt so tormented. Okay, nvm, It is over! As long as the japanese students is having fun! I dont mind! :D Chinatown & bugis outing was alright! except for the weird boss of the souvenir shop. He kept laughing at me, praise me, & says that I look like his ex-GF, how cute, blah blah... lastly, He asked for my no. SCARY MAX, I wanted to flee as far as possible but the Japanese students was shopping in his shop! WAH LAO!

Anyway, the students are all very fun to be with! I am actually glad that I can interact with them well! I can't communicate in japanese though, sigh sigh sigh. I envy those that speaks Japanese fluently.

Sadly, I am not joining them today! cause mommy doesn't want me to go Pulau Ubin & I have to pack my MESSY room! cause I will be homestaying a girl! didn't want them to get freak out by my messy room! & also, I have not packed my luggage. :( HOWWWWWWWWW.

Next! I will be met Toot, Wanchew & gongYY on Mon night for supper after USS! thank you toot for coming Vivo to help me take my bag (I force him) HAHAHA. & thanks to him, we both got lost for many many times. (handphone= low batt= No GPRS). I think we saw the same ESSO for more than 10 times. WTF. Why? because he was screaming in the car, singing, scolding me, telling me how good is he in singing. FUNNY MAX. then send WC & YY home. No joke, different directions. LOL. extreme east, extreme North, & we live at extreme West.!

Next! Grades! I freaking pass my RM. got a D. ROFL. My grades are still so so lousy, like shit. but I am glad I passed. Since I didn't really studied very very hard for it. I actually got more than what I deserve. Like wad my FB status says; " 老天爷，谢谢你一直以来都那么疼爱我， 保佑我。。。♥♥ "

Hehe, Okay, I went for eyelash extension (& took it out they next day! -_-) & pedicure on Saturday! & then HIPPO CRUISE! (as I mentioned, I can't upload my pictures) so I literally "KOP" (stole) from my sis blog! :D Since she says that my photography skills sucks. :( anyway! Iphone 4s camera really not bad!

but my eyes was swollen max due to the eyelash extend! :( & my face so cui cause never put make up lah! GRRR. lol.

 

CIAO, freaking laptop keeps hanging! shall blog till here!
Sorry for this absurpt ending!!

TIME TO PACK MY ROOM

formspring.me

Tell me anything. http://www.formspring.me/aipoh

Looking For Room For Rent

As what the topic says,
Are you looking for a room for rent?
At my age, there are many of my fellows from other countries coming to Singapore to advance their studies, or even some people might want to move out to live on their own.
It is not easy owning a flat on your own, the public housing(HDB) which are owned by the government doesn't simply allow anyone to buy the flats. There are many conditions to it. & not everyone can own a private house, eg: condo/landed properties
Thus, The best choice is to RENT A ROOM.
In fact, many people around me are looking for a room to rent.(this includes my dear friends from malaysia)
The best thing is to get a room without going through the agent, with a clean & good environment at an affordable price.
They often call me for help to look for places to stay & even made suggestions to lodge at my place!
Obviously, with such a big family I have, I can't possibly allow them to stay in my house. There are many ways to telling people that You have rooms for rent or, you want to rent a room.
Have you ever seen people pasting their notices on lamppost? lift? notice board? This is one way.
Another way is through newspapers or agents, which are pretty costly.
I believe no one wants to pay more when they can pay less!
Life is made easy now with the new website, http://www.ibilik.sg/.
You are able to browse through the rooms for rent in any location in Singapore!
from the west to the east, from the north to the south! & vice versa!
I personally feel that this is better than finding an accommodations for yourself, one by one.
This is because,  you can browse through all the rooms for rent and make a final decision wisely with this websites.
As you enter the website, you can click on your destined locations, & Ta-da! all the rooms available will be there for you to browse through! In addition, they wrote everything in details.

& in this website, you can find really nice rooms for Short-Term Rental?
This is the best deal ever for people with overseas friends/relatives coming over to visit them!
you can now rent a room for them near your place for convenience & also, to SAVE MONEY by renting a place for them than to book a hotel!
Isn't that awesome?

Or, if you want, you can rent a room yourself for a short holiday! Teehee^^ (okay, I am just kidding!)

So in conclusion, if you are looking for room for rent, What are you waiting for?
This is a very good website you can trust & rely on!

PS: Toot, you can find a better room here!

Alright! that is all for now!:)

LEAP YEAR

MUST POST 一下！:D

HOLIDAY IS HERE.:(

happy, but yet not that happy.

Cause I totally screwed up my last 50% paper. & due to the fact that I failed badly for the first test for this module. I think i am so gonna fail.

I DONT WANT REPEAT MY MODULE LAH. :<

Oh well, only have got myself to blame.
Shall just prepare for the worse and pray for the best.

God, please show me that you are watching over me.
GIVE ME YOUR BLESSING. :(

anyway, holidays is here. like finally.
I am not working this holiday. which means, I will have no income. Sad, cause yuxin backed out from the It fair due to her schoolwork, there goes my $500. lol. & i didn;t want to work as admin. I want those events job. whereby I can have fun & interact with people, while working & learning! anyone can intro not? Or any freelance/flexible working timing job.

HAVE NOT?!

& I backed out from my sec class chalet.
I have my own reasons, & i am not saying here.
I don't want people to assume and make things worse.
so, some of my dear friends. please understand.:)
anyway, I dont think people will want me to be there also.
oh well.

anyway, holiday is coming, which means, my birthday is coming too.
oh well, I have no plans, & I am super not looking forward to it.
maybe I will bake some rainbow cupcakes to giveaway. Thanks-giving 19.(this is if my baking is a success and I am not too lazy to bake)
I did mention that 2012 shall be a generous year right? :)

& yeah, I do not have any items on my wishlist as well.
I do not want to rip off my friend's pocket with the items I want to get.
eg, a car, a polariod, a bag, MONEY, HAPPINESS, & HEALTH.
i am that too demanding.
anyway, I doubt anyone is getting me a gift. since I am not celebrating, and I am not meeting any of my friends.
Even my sister ain;t getting any gifts for me. :( she wants to give me her leftover $5 fruitbar. SIGH.

Le sigh, I have no chance to own my R1 now. but I swear I will get a car even better than R1 after I graduate.
I don't want to use my dad's name to buy the car. (cause I dont want tongues to wag)
But, why is my dad getting a car? :(

臭爸爸，买车都不驾的！拿几百千放在那里摆美！:<

he simply buy a car for show, cause he seldom drives, like maybe once a week, and he doesn't allow others to drive his car.

AWESOME HOR? grrr.

Oh well,
I AM STILL SO WORRIED.
this blogpost is in a mess. but I DONT CARE. :(

no mood to do so anyway.

Am gonna sleep.

PS: PLEASE LET ME PASS. JUST PASS WILL DO. :(

真实丢脸死了！

I am so so ashame to be from my secondary school.
why is my secondary school always on news headlines? stomped? :(

I mean, yuhua has a very reputable concert band, harmonica band. etc. etc.
Why do we have such teachers/students now that has to ruined our reputation.

Our school has the one of the lousiest facilities, not to mention the poor environment and the very old building and limited space. (so different from my primary school)

I shall not condemned my secondary school as I have to admit that there are nice teachers around too.
I have to disclaim that I do love my school, my teachers and of course my friends there, not forgetting my CCA. but my school seriously has got many problems.

Few years back, a student threatened a teacher, and the teacher was so afraid that he reported the case to police... & Tadaa! he is on news headlines.
For that, I think that he is a victim as he is really a very funny & responsible teacher (my sis classmate, rofl).
I mean, he did no wrong, except being unable to fight back for himself.

Sometimes, I really have to say that the news/newspaper/online news exaggerates everything to make it interesting. YOU HAVE TO AGREE WITH ME FOR THIS. (who will read boring & mundane news right?) & some news are man-made rumors that is SO NOT TRUE. or the news may only depicts 50% or less of the real truth. Okay lah, maybe the content is there but they twisted the story-line to make it looks more 0_0! WOW! & make people got so emotionally tangled in the news.

& recently, my dearest juniors got stomped twice for kissing and caressing each other in a playground, and in another case, void deck.

To be honest, i find that no big deal, they are growing adults, they will make mistakes, and such mistakes can definitely be forgiven. Moreover, can you tell me what is stomp for? I personally take stomp as an entertainment. haha, YES, I am that boliao to read post that are posted by boliao people. Some news are so funny & informative! Get that shit!

This time round, this is going way far absurd.
Putting pinhole cameras in girls toilet and harassing female students?
WTF, shame on you, my ex-teacher. SHAME ON YOU.

Picture credit: Lian he wan bao.

there is no way you can defend yourselves nor clear your names.
YOUR ACTIONS ARE RECORDED.
I don't know why did you made such grave mistake.
you are a teacher that I know to be dedicated to the school and your job, and has contributed much to the school & society.
I believe you should be educated and smart enough to think of the consequences.
WHY DID YOU HAVE TO MAKE SUCH STUPID MISTAKES?
I am so glad to have graduated. if not, I might be so ashamed that I will transfer.

I don't mean to magnify and telecast this matter, but ugly truth will be known.
especially when people (like me) are such KPO that loves gossiping.
so please do not ask me to remove this post or what's not.
There is no use hiding anything.

Disclaimer: I am not trying to stir up anymore problems, but to blog how i felt.

GOOD LUCK TO YOU!

okay,I shall not be too enraged with this matter, & get my ass off to start studying for my 50% exam tomorrow. WTF, sucha last-minute queen am I. :X

Travelling with a heavy heart.

First time in my life, (okay, maybe not). I procrastinate so much for an overseas trip. To thailand ONLY.

A week ago, my family, my father, mother, brother, sister, bro-in-law and niece decided to travel to thailand to celebrate my brother's birthday and to visit a uncle (a very good friend of my dad). & to also, go for the special massage session.

& we procrastinate so so much that the air tickets price hike and doubled.
I then, didn't want to go at that point of time cause I didn't want to pay for something I could get at a much cheaper price.
Moreover, I am having exams now. (fyi, this week is my revision week)

But in the end, I decided to go with them, since we seldom travel together and I didn't want to be left alone with my elder brother in singapore. (I probably will end up being tortured). My mum also insisted that I should go for the massage cause I am always having tummyache. So, We purchased the tickets despite the hike in the prices.

Now, I seriously don't feel like going.
One of the reason might be due to the exams, I am afraid that I might fail, but as what my mum told me, I dont even study even if I am at home. *bad habit never dies*.
and next, it is because my parents ain't travelling with us anymore. My father was admitted to hospital on sunday night, sighhh. I really hope he recovers well.
& I really want to stay by my mum and his side, cause I didn't manage to do my part as a daughter the other time he had his operations as I had mine at the same time and I was staying at my aunt's place. & I really want to accompany my mom. I am that 'sticky'.
I didn't want to waste $270. although my mum said it is ok if I really dont want to go, and then she told me she really want me to go for the massage. then she add on, saying that we should minimize our loses. since both my dad and her have already wasted $500+.

So, I have to go. :(
at least my sis, bro, bil and niece will be with me.
I hope it will be a fun trip.
but I still hasn't pack my luggage. Time now, 11.30 am. setting off at 10am tomorrow. SIGH.

PS: may my dad recover soon, & i hope i wont fail my exams.

A little thoughts.

Le sigh,

Life has been really unpleasant.
deep thoughts running in my mind.
Sometimes I really wish to blog and vent out my frustration, but I reckon that it is not a very wise thing to do. given that people do read my blog, even though I have a very very pathetic no. of readers now as compare to the hundreds I used to have. As much as I would love to blog & share, but some people just read my blog, misinterpret my meaning, misunderstand me, twist my stories, and I seriously don't feel good about it. & sometimes, I just don't want to share any upset thoughts, and make others think that I am gaining anyone's sympathy...cause I am not.

& I truly understand, cause I am not that 'famous' now, and I have no cool stories to share anymore. this is how mundane my life is. & I don't want my blog to sound full of negativity and look so sad. That is why, I am not blogging that often now anymore.

dear life, why have you been so hard on me...
I don't understand how did I survive the past few years of my life. I don't meant that I am leading a very bad life, I met a drastic change that which I think I have not adapt to it. *le sigh* how I wish I am forever 3 years old.

Going to poly was another mistake I made in life. I always thought that poly is very fun, something like playgroup, where you get to meet really good friends and you get to do your work in a really fun and pleasant environment. everything is so cool, and the school is full of facilities and attractions to be in. You will be working so well with all your friends and you guys can go shopping after school, parade around orchard, go have high-tea and party every fortnightly. not forgetting, you will also be joining CCAs that your secondary might not have, and make many more good friends. I AM SO WRONG.:<

As I tried to feel positive and happy about my poly life, but I just can't feeling sad as I walk to school, I can't help feeling worried how school will be when I am in train. and as I step out of Dover MRT, I totally hate the feeling of walking uphill, alone... People might think that I am exaggerating and that I am just making up excuses not to go to school, but I am not.. I really would love to get super close to my poly-mates, and feel important like how I was in primary or secondary.

At least, when I am in my primary and secondary, I had some use and many many friends. almost everyone is my friend. (although people hate me as well, but I manage to survive well) I love myself more, as I am the me I want to be, that helpful, cheerful, bubbly, full of nonsense aipoh. I am always helping the teacher, helping my peers and I felt that my presence is useful. I can't help feeling so useless now, as my grades are so bad. I swear I didn't feel good about it, but I just act as if like I don't care. cause I find it no point brooding over it and make myself look like a loser. I am the one that didn't put in the effort and my grades were in my own hands, what can I say.

Now, I can't help feeling that everyone hates my presence. Although it is not said, but I can feel it from the actions, body languages and expressions. And sometimes, I heard those little comments about me, behind my back. I guessed I am pretty sad about it. My presence ain't important in school/life anymore. & I feel somehow outcasted and useless. I have to disclaim that I do love my friends, classmates and tutors a lot, I am really fine with all my peers but I dont know, things just feels weird. Sometimes, I can't help feeling sad over the incidents that have happened.. Maybe it is really me, that I can't get along well with others, and that I can't adapt to my life and I am too straight forward. I really don't want to imagine how bad I am in other's eyes.

People just don't know me well, and I hope you guys will understand how hard is it for me to explain myself, sharing my thoughts, that is the reason why.. I rather keep myself in silence. It is really not that I don't want to share, but I  don't know how to. So, when people don't know me, they assume and make up their own thoughts about it. which is,most of the time.. SO NOT ME. and I feel so sad about it. & then I might try to distance myself away from you, and then you feel that I am the one that is hiding away, and more stories about me will be shared. And the evil cycle continues. It is really unfair to me for you to judge me by what you heard from others, or my attitude in school/class/wherever without knowing what is running through my mind.

I don't want to explain myself anymore, people who know, will know. I think that I have changed, to someone I dont really adore, but I myself don't know what I am going through now. I am so selfish, so unhelpful and I don't trust people easily anymore. I am always full of doubts and am afraid that people might harm me. that is why, I don't even make friends anymore. & my friends I had don't even ask me out anymore, I guess that must have developed a hatred for me, since I am always rejecting them. My life is so screwed, I feel so inferior about my grades, my size, my social circle, my family. I envy those that have everything that I don't have.

I must say that I am thankful to those peers that have been encouraging and those that has always been there when I needed help. I don't know, life is just so depressing. 

le sigh, le sigh. 

Alpha + JYP audition.

Hi people, Please tell me HOW not to feel heartache. Please.

First of all,

this is my audition number I got today.

Looks familiar yeah? Guess what came out for the FIRST PRIZE for 4D today? T_T
8730.

While I was waiting for my turn, I got this strong sense of feeling I will strike 4D today, I 仿佛 heard a sound asking me to buy my number, system roll. (which means 24 打)

Of course, at that point of time, I didn't think that much. but right after audition, I went to buy porkchop for my brother.(since he lend me his car). & then the strong feeling comes again. Thus, I asked the auntie(selling pork chop) if there is any singapore pool around, & even showed her my no. & talked some crap with her.

So, when I reach home. I pleaded my brother to buy 4d for me, he refused. hence, I called my mom. She says okay, then I suggest to share with her, cause the system roll is kinda expensive.

Now,  I feel really IDIOT+STUPID+HEARTACHE, cause I didn't double check my sticker, & I told her to buy 0397. then I went to paste my sticker on the altar. then I went for my nap.

So, my mom & bro tried to call me (but my phone was switched off). they wanted to tell me that I almost strike the first prize. Till my mom comes to my room and screamed me awake. She saw the sticker & say, I told her the wrong number, if not I would have strike the first prize.

TELL ME, TELL ME HOW NOT TO BE SAD. :<
it is like, i have this strong sense and feeling. & yet, I hastily say a no without checking (cause I was eating pork chop). The porkchop is sure expensive.
& if I totally never buy at all, I might feel less unhappy.
The feeling of buying but buy wrong no, & yet the actual no came out first prize is totally NO GOOD. NO GOOD. NO GOOD.

HAISH.
 命里有时终须有，命里无时莫强求。
But now, the money is sent right in front of me & yet I pushed it away.

DUMB-F**K.
everyone is laughing at my stupidness. I so wanna cry.

& my audition didn't went well.
I was asked to shift in while I was singing. Was about to sing chorus, & they ask me to shift in. Oh well, think it is because I don't have the looks nor appearance nor figure. SAD LIFE.
I wasted 6 hours of my life.
& let the chance of striking first prize slip away.
Maybe I should say, I threw it away myself.




SO UNCOOL.

PUT YOUR HANDS UP!

I freaking passed the MENSA test.

Read that? 156, top 99 percentile.

rofl, this was very unexpected. 

let me tell you why.

1) I did not prepare for this test at all.& i slept freaking late the night before. T_T. maybe, just trying out IQ test with my tabby & online the night before. (my tabby IQ test, gave me the courage to take up this test)

2) The next door, (where I was having test) is playing HANDS UP by 2PM, I was so engross in it, singing with it tgt. apparently.. there are kids having party next door also. so you can imagine the screams, laughter & cries.

3) I went late for the test, couldn't find the place. so I went roaming around suntec with Yuxin. & I was running at the last 5 mins. dashing into the room. Dramatic much, but yeah. 

4) I never thought myself to be this... capable. the thought of joining mensa has never came upon me. I only wanted to know my IQ. but sadly, I only came to know that, this is not an official IQ test results. but good enough to gauge your IQ level.

5) My GPA of 2 has brought my morale and confidence, so so low. & I have never done super well in a test before. Perhaps , I should blame myself for not studying, and thank god for watching over me all these while. I am thankful how I always Pass my test, with minimal studied done. I simply took things for granted ya.

I need to do some self-reflections.

okay, i think 2012 is going well:)

(in fact, 2011 dec is pretty awesome!)

please continue to stay this way! 

except that, out of 11 day, I am sick for 9 days?

Diarrhea, constipation, fever, cough, flu, headache, sore throat, what's new?

I am so scare now, as the doctor says that there might be something wrong with my stomach. & i have HPB, what?!!!!!!!? Haishhh...

Nevermind, Need to build up my stamina. 

I will be healthier!

Ohmy, I feel some sense of achievement now!^^

I am not that useless and stupid afterall!

I will be successful one day!

PS: I am not trying to be proud! I am just, still in a state of shock+happiness.

Some resolutions for 2012 now. 

-Stay healthy

- Slim down. (air stewardess? hahahaha. inside joke)

-Class 2B

-Grade 1 and above cert in 1/2 musical instruments

-Some skills certificates.

-Spend lesser!

- Have at least 4-5 figure in my bank account. (before decimal)

-Pull up my GPA

-Go to at least 2 countries (other than Malaysia & hatyai!)

-Pass my JYP audition. (not that impt, but yeah!)

-Do more Community Services! :D

-

realise what?
i didn't put things like, XXX brand bags, YYY brand watch, ZZZ brand heels, AAA brand clothings, BBB brand camera, etc etc.

reason being, I grew up already. so, I feel that all these are necessary, they are my desires. LOL

I AM JUST KIDDING.

cause these items are in my wishlist!

& my wishlist is forever changing. 

however, I need to control on my spendings. 

So yeah, GOOD LUCK TO ME.

okay, byebye!

my FM tutor gonna debar me from exams soon. 

fml, he has no rights to do so.

& if he does that. I will definitely blow this matter up. 

USS with Hilda & Ping!